Last week one of my network contacts asked if I will ever run out of ideas. I didn’t quite understand what they were referring to, so I asked my contact to be more specific. “You write for the 405 club, and it seems that you never run out of subjects to write about. Aren’t you worried that you will wake up one morning and run out of ideas?”

    My first response was, “Does Sir Paul McCartney wake up in the morning and worry if he will run out of ideas for new songs?” Truth be told, I am concerned that one morning I will wake up, go to my laptop and as I open my OpenOffice writer, I will draw a complete blank. However this has not happened yet. Even on days where I am not sure what I am going to write, once I start typing, ideas just seem to come to me. 

   This week is no exception. As I was driving home this afternoon, I was thinking about what I could do to help cheer up those who have not yet found a job to replace the one they lost. It was then that the imaginary light bulb lit above my head. I thought it would be a great idea to share my worst job interview experiences. Perhaps it may make others who are going through similar situations know that they are not alone. Let’s face it, sometimes, despite our best efforts, a job interview does not always turn out the way we expect it to. So this week I have decided to share…

MY WORST JOB INTERVIEWS

(Writer’s note:  All Company names and people mentioned have been changed to protect….. no one in particular)

   We have all gone though some bad interviews in our lives. We all head to an interview with the best of intentions along with the hope that we may eventually see an employment offer. As we know by now, it does not always work out that way. When an interview goes sour, it leaves us feeling demoralized and unimportant. The point that I want to make is that everyone has this type of interview from time to time. I hope that, by sharing some of my worst interviews, you will realize that these interviews are sometimes unavoidable. The best thing you can do is to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and keep trying. I often refer to these as “Interviews from Hell.”  Whenever  you go through one of these interviews, I just want you to know that you are not alone.

Interview #1: It was the middle of summer. It seemed as though most offices have either gone on summer shut-down; or maybe it was the recession; or maybe employers figured they would wait until September to fill positions. It was late in the week, so I decided that I would do some yard work. Even though I was armed with my electric saw, I always kept my cell phone nearby. It seemed that was a wise decision. As I turned off the saw, I heard my cell phone ringing.

   “Is this Mr. Young?” the voice on the line inquired.

   “This is Mr. Young. May I ask who is calling?”

   “My name is Mr. Paulsen from Super J. Products. I read your resume on Hot Jobs and I am very impressed with your credentials. We have an immediate opening for someone with extensive experience in Supply Chain.”

   I told the person on the other end of the line that the position was an opportunity I was definitely interested in.

   “OK. We would like to schedule you for an interview. Can you be here in a half hour?”

   I responded “Sir, to be honest with you, I am doing heavy yard work right now. Your offices are about a 45 minute drive from where I reside.”

   The man on the phone paused a minute. “Mr. Young, we urgently need to fill this position. If you can interview with us today, and your credentials meet our requirements, we can have you start by the beginning of next week. We would really appreciate it if you can come down today.”

   My intuition began to kick in. Every other employer who called me gave me a few days to review the company on the internet. I often used the opportunity to ask for an employment application.. Why were these people so anxious to see me? My intuition was telling me that something was wrong, but on the other hand I felt I had nothing to lose. 

   We eventually agreed to schedule the interview for 2PM that afternoon. I ended the call, put away my electric saw, and headed for the shower.

   As I drove to the interview, I remembered something my wife said before she left for work that day. “Howard”, she said, I really think you should consider using a hair color product. Your hair is beginning to turn gray. Perhaps a younger appearance may help with your face to face interviews.”

   About 45 minutes later I arrived at the company. As I opened the visitors entrance door I found myself in a small vestibule that seemed reminiscent of a solitary confinement cell. On the opposite side of the door there was a phone with a plaque above it. The letters on the plaque were in bold font and stated, “This Phone for Internal Use Only! —- Please dial 10 for Personnel.”

   I followed the instructions. The phone rang over a dozen times, however no one answered the phone. Puzzled, I placed the phone back on the receiver.  I figured that this was a good time to take out my cell phone and call the man who contacted me. Before I started to dial, the phone in the vestibule rang. After thinking about it for a moment, I picked up the phone.

   “Are you Mr. Young?” the man on the phone asked?  I answered affirmatively. We will have someone out to see you in a moment. I waited. About a half hour later, a well tanned man in his 30’s invited me into the interview room, which was slightly larger than the vestibule I had left.

   The man looked at me in disbelief. I was beginning to think that I should have paid attention to my intuition and avoided this interview, however I figured at this point I may as well see it through. The man introduced himself.

   “I am Mr. Paulsen. I have read your interview for this position. Do you have any questions for me about this position?”

   Now this was weird. Usually the interviewer tells me something about the position asks me about my background, throws in some industry related technical questions, and then, I get to ask some questions. I asked myself, “What part of this interview did I miss?”

   I figured I would start off with a question I usually ask at the end of most of my interviews. “If I am the candidate of choice for this position, what is the first goal you would want me to accomplish?”

   Mr. Paulsen. responded. “Actually this is a standard supply chain position. We will give you tasks to complete and we expect you to complete them promptly.”

   Talk about generic answers! I decided to choose a different question. “What is the most critical problem your company faces relevant to my position?”

   Mr Paulsen again responded: “As I stated before, your position is a standard supply chain related position. We have the same issues as any supply chain related industry has.”

   I was beginning to think this was a complete waste of my time, however I figured that, while I was there, I may as well push the issue a bit.

“Can you be a little more specific as to the nature or your problems. I have worked in Supply Chain for quite some time and I have found that every company has a unique problem.”

   This time, the answer was abrupt. “Do you have any additional questions for me Mr. Young?”

   I figured at this point I would cut right to the chase. “What is your time frame for filling this position?”

   “We expect to fill this position in about a week, We will call back two people for a final interview and make our decision.” I had to ask one final question. “Will you contact me to let me know the outcome and if you will schedule me for an additional interview?”

   “Have a nice day Mr. Young. The exit is the door on the right.”

   I exited through the appopriate door.  If I were a character in a comic book, a large question mark would appear over my head as I left.  Since this “interview” took place, I have had some time to think about it.  The big question is, how did I go from someone who was urgently needed to someone they could not wait to get rid of? Here are my thoughts:

1): The company found someone who arrived sooner than I did and they were awarded the position on the spot

2): Based on the way my interviewer looked at me, I could have been a victim of age discrimination.

   During the summer of 2009, however, this was just one of several negative experiences.  The best (or worst, depending on your point of view) was yet to come.

Good Hunting to all.

-By Howard K. Young, Contributing Writer & Member of The 405 Club.

View all of Howard’s posts here.